Bhima, his
brothers, and his mother had just escaped the fire set by King Dhritarasthra,
Purochana and the scheming Prince Duryodhana. They now had to roam the
wilderness in exile. The family was tired, and hungry as they made their way
through the winter forest. All of a sudden Bhima spotted a wild boar. He chased
the boar and wrestled it down with his strong arms. The boar squealed as he
delivered the final blow. He did not like taking the life of an innocent
animal, but he had to provide for his family. He looked up to the sky and gave
a silent prayer to thank God for the food. He and his family then found a nice
place to settle down for the night. They started a fire and feasted. After
dinner, they all went to sleep while Bhima kept watch.
During this time
two rakshashas named Hidimba and Hidimbi were travelling through the forest.
Hidimba was a strong rakshasha male armed with a bow and ax. Hidimbi was his
beautiful shape-shifting sister. They have not eaten in 3 weeks because most of
the food sources are hard to find and access in the wintertime. Their noses
picked up on the lingering scent of cooked boar that Bhima and his family had
for dinner. They followed the scent with excitement and finally spotted the
family through the trees. Hidimba was ready to rush into battle to claim the
family as food, but Hidimbi said that she had a better idea. She knew Bhima was
strong and she had to devise a plan to win this battle.
Hidimbi
approached Bhima the next morning. She shape shifted into the most beautiful woman
the whole world has ever seen. Bhima was attracted to the rakshasha woman but
knew his main job was to ensure the safety of his family. After some discussion
with his mother and him she slowly started to make progress with Bhima. During
this time, Hidimba rushed on to the scene. He acted like he was angry at his
sister for betraying him and attacked Bhima.
The two fought a
fierce battle as the family and Hidimbi watched. As they were fighting, Hidimbi
quickly pulled Bhima’s mother towards her and held her hostage with a dagger.
The other brothers were not targets because their mother was the most
vulnerable target out of the family and precious to the family. Armed with no
weapon the brothers could not do anything to save their mother. Bhima looked over
to all of the commotion and realized that Hidimbi had tricked him. As he was
observing the situation, Hidimba shot an arrow at his arm and punched him to
the ground. Bhima and his brothers all watched in helplessness because they
knew they were going to lose their mother. Hidimba let out a menacing laugh and
made way toward his sister. In one quick movement, the bloodied warrior Bhima
grabbed Hidimba’s bow and shot an arrow straight through Hidimbi’s head. During
this moment, Hidimba quickly stabbed Bhima straight through his stomach. Bhima
fell to the ground in pain.
The brothers
rushed the weakened Hidimba in anger. They secured a quick victory and they
made way to their mother who was sulking next to the failed warrior Bhima. They
all prayed for hours trying to obtain assistance from the Gods. Finally they
came down.
“Due to the
virtues of bravery, selflessness, and respect for his mother we grant the great
warrior Bhima another chance,” the Gods stated. They then quickly vanished.
Bhima’s wounds disappeared and the next morning he woke up. His family thanked
him for his valiant efforts.
Bhima fights with
Hidimba.
Author’s Note:
In the original stories called Bhima and Hidimba and Hidimbi the plot is
different. Hidimbi is sent to attack the family and accidentally falls in love
with Bhima. Her brother Hidimba approaches the scene and is angered by the fact
that she has betrayed him. He then attacks the family and ends up getting
killed by Bhima. Bhima and Hidimbi later get married and have a child. I was surprised
on how quickly Hidimbi and Hidimba’s bond was severed. I changed the story so
that they were still on the same side. I also incorporated themes such as
respecting your parents that I have seen throughout every reading in this
class.
I thought you put an interesting twist on this story. I agree, the “love at first sight” concept in the original story doesn’t seem realistic. There were a few confusing moments in the story. First, when Hidimbi talks to Bhima, I am not convinced that Bhima is enamored with Hidimbi. Instead of saying that she made “progress,” tell the readers what specifically she did to attract Bhima. Next, when Bhima is introduced to Hidimba, you said “he acted like he was angry at his sister for betraying him and attacked Bhima.” I think this would be a good place to use dialogue. With the given information, it doesn’t seem like Bhima would know that Hidimba is mad at his sister – just that some random rakshasa is attacking him. Also, when Bhima takes Hibimba’s bow, you could use a little more description to clarify the action. For instance, you could say that, with supernatural speed and strength spurred by his anger, Bhima ripped the bow out of Hibimba’s hand. Other than a few moments of unclear action, I thought the story flowed well. Good work!
ReplyDeleteI loved the way you added some of the morals that seem to be prevalent in all the stories seamlessly into this story. It was a really subtle detail that added a lot to the characterization. Also, the fight scene was amazing. The pacing was perfect and I loved the way you made Bhima be mortally wounded but kept true to the story through the use of prayer to the gods. It was such a shocking twist to the story and it was very creative, but also seemed true to the style of the original. This was a great story!
ReplyDeleteI liked how you changed the story up a bit. It seems like a lot of people like to put a twist to the story, but to stick to the same plot, so I like reading stories that have more than just a little twist to them. I also thought you did a good job briefly summarizing the original story line while outlining the changes you made in your author's note. I often struggle coming up with ideas of how to change my story, so your story inspired me to try to be more creative for my next storytelling post. Good job!
ReplyDeleteI think that this was a clever way to stay true to a story without adding a huge twist to the plot line. And, honestly this way it makes more sense. I do agree, that there is always a blatant trend in every story we have done in our readings that emphasize the importance of obeying our parents' wishes above all things. Overall I think it flowed quite well! Good job!
ReplyDelete